


Butterflies of Words

by Sashaya



Series: All the single ladies (grab your gal-pals) [9]
Category: Tomb Raider (Video Game)
Genre: F/F, Hurt/Comfort, Letters, Long-Distance Relationship, Love, Love Letters, Past-Tomb Raider, Pre-Raise of the Tomb Raider, Raise of the Tomb Raider, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-03-08
Updated: 2018-01-17
Packaged: 2018-09-30 22:58:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 2,294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10174328
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sashaya/pseuds/Sashaya
Summary: Emails and letters between Lara and Sam after Yamatai.





	1. Butterfly 1

**Author's Note:**

> **_Disclaimer:_** _I don't own any of the characters._
> 
> So, this thing ran away from me a bit. Now it will include Lara's time spend in 'Raise of the Tomb Raider' time(line) and most likely post-ROTTR. 
> 
> Please, enjoy.

**To:** _Queen Sam_

 **From:** _Lara Croft_

 

Dear Sam, 

This seems weird because I saw you, what? a week ago? And I miss you. A lot. Miss you like I’d miss my arm or leg, like I’d miss my gun… and it’s probably weird but I feel so bloody helpless and defenseless without you. 

I hope that you’re doing well, that your new psychologist gets you this time. The last one was a complete wanker, I’m sorry you had to deal with him. Seriously, someone should have reported him before. I’m sorry.

I wanted… I wanted to talk about what happened… _before_ … I don’t want to bring up any bad memories for you but I still mean it. I love you. I have for years now. 

I’m not entirely sure if I’m not… jumping the gun on this one, but I cannot… I cannot think of going through something like this again and not telling you how I feel. Selfish, I know. But, oh God, Sam I love you and the thought of losing you – again – terrifies me. Even if I’d lose you to time and distance. I don’t want to lose you. Never again. 

I love you, Sam. You can do with this knowledge whatever you want.

Love, Lara.


	2. Butterfly 2

**To:** _Lara <3 _

**From:** _nishimura_queen_

 

Lara, 

You’re an idiot. Complete and utter idiot and I have no idea what to do with you. 

I remember what happened before Yamatai, I remember every word you said that night. And I’ve been obsessing over it since we came back. But you didn’t say anything and you looked like you tried to avoid it? There’s not much what a girl can do, when you send off ‘please, don’t’ vibes, Lara. 

You’re a genius but you’re also so stupid? I thought you changed your mind because you spend the last weeks chasing after me, rescuing me. I was the ultimate damsel in distress! I couldn’t even blame you for signing off because there’s so much a girl can do, you know? I kind of accepted that you were no longer interested… It hurt but okay, things change and I would stop loving you after a bit. 

But you spend the last weeks chasing and rescuing me. It gets to a girl’s head and I couldn’t get you out of my mind, my knight in shining leather. Lara, I love you. I said so, when you confessed on that damn boat before Yamatai. Nothing changed, not for me. 

I’m still me, Lara. I might be a bit jumpier and I’m not leaving my home for the next month but I’m still me, your Sam. And I love you, you smart idiot. 

We’re both idiots, seriously. We deserve each other. 

Call me, when you can. 

With love, Sam.


	3. Butterfly 3

**To** : _Lara <3 _

**From** : _nishimura_queen_

 

Lara, what is going on? 

The papers are dragging your name through the mud and back and you’re quiet? This is not the Lara I know because my Lara would go out there and tear all of this blatant assholes down. Don’t tell me you believe them, kitten. 

You’re not crazy… well, maybe a bit you are. You’re clearly not normal and I love you for that. I didn’t know your father but if he had the most wonderful and amazing child like you, he couldn’t really lose all his marbles. You are you, Lara, and not some loon from the papers. Get out and fight. Get your claws out, I know you can, kitten. 

Give Jonah a call, he’s going crazy. 

I love you. Be strong, kitten. 

Love, Sam


	4. Butterfly 4

**To:** _Lara <3_

 **From:** _nishimura_queen_

 **Title:** _OPEN_

 

Lara, I seriously hope you’re not ignoring my calls AND mails because I can’t even tell you how pissed I’d be. Also, if you’re nose deep in some old-time books, at least take care of yourself, call your girlfriend that you’re alive? This sort of thing? 

Seriously, kitten, there’s a press shit-storm around your name and you keep on hiding. They got to Reyes and her girl because of the Yamatai thing. They went after me but let me tell you, Shisa likes only you. She was vicious and I had to spoil her a little bit. 

Lara, let me help. I won’t get into your way. I’m not leaving my house - trust me - but let me show you that you don’t have to push me away. Yamatai wasn’t your fault, the vultures aren’t your fault. Let me love you, kitten. 

Please, write me a mail. Christ, I’ll take a pigeon with a letter right now! Give me a call. Whatever. Before I have to leave my house to see you. I will, you know I will, but I’m giving you some time before I go to such extremes. 

I love you. Call me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> _Shisa_ is Sam's cat. As far as I know, it's only part of my imagination and not 'canon creature'.


	5. Butterfly 5

**To** : _Queen Sam_

 **From** : _Lara Croft_

 

Sam. My darling, precious, wonderful Sam. I’m going to marry you one day, just so you know. Be ready for that.

I’m sorry about the reporters, somehow I didn’t think they’ll go after you or the rest. I already pulled a few strings – some that I still had – they should give up now. 

Thank you for giving me strength, for not letting me get lost in my head. Thank you for being here for me. I love you. You’re everything for me.

I’m planning my next journey – Syria this time , somewhere warm is nice for my skin, as Jonah says. 

I’m hoping to find something, Sam, something big. Bigger than Yamatai, something Dad was looking for. 

When I get back… Maybe you can visit Croft Manor… I’m having problems with Uncle Atlas, I’m sure there’s something inside my childhood home that I can use. Think about it. It’s not… a must, a ‘make it or break it’ type of deal. I just… want you here, with me. 

I love you, Sam.

You are my world, darling.

~ Lara


	6. Butterfly 6: Butterfly Unsent

Dear Sam…

Syria turned to Siberia and I can’t say how much I regret everything. This, right here, is second Yamatai and the only silver lining is that you’re not here, with me. 

Everything is going wrong, I’m terrified. I’m terrified I’m not going to make it. I won’t see you again. See Jonah.

There must be one adventure that’s going to be my last – like my mother’s. What if this is it? What if I used up all my luck? I met you, how much luck normal people have?

I love you. I promised to marry you and now… now I don’t know if I’ll see you again. 

I’m scared that this won’t stop me, if I survive.

This… I don’t think you’ll ever see this. 

I love you. I hope Shisa is looking over you, like I wish I could right now.

See you soon. Hopefully. 

Love, Lara  
 


	7. Butterfly 7: Butterfly Unchecked

**To** : Lara <3

 **From** : nishimura_queen

 **Title** : Untitled

 

You’re missing. Again. This time without me, without Jonah, who called for help. You’re all alone and… and I’m still terrified of leaving my house. You’re alone, maybe injured, maybe even dead and I can’t make myself leave and join Jonah on the search!

You didn’t give up on me and I can’t… I tried, kitten, I tried but I can’t.

I love you. I’m gonna strangle you, when you come back. Please, come back. Please, Lara, please.

I love you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this chapter has been sitting in my folder for... well, since July. I have no words. I don't have any more pre-written chapters (like it helped...), so I have no idea when I will post here again. I'm not abandoning this work, because this is far from a conclusion, but people, who do suscribe, brace yourself for even longer wait. 
> 
> Though, I decided that maybe a re-playthru is in order, because I just fell away from this couple and fandom. Who knows. 
> 
> Thank you all for reading! I hope you enjoyed!
> 
> I'm sustained by comments even more than kudos (tho, they are very much welcome), so please comment on your way out!


	8. Butterfly 8: Butterfly Kept

Sam,

I will come back to you. No matter what. It doesn’t matter how, it doesn’t matter how long it will take me to do this, but I will come back home to you. I will come back, give you all the letters that I couldn’t send and I will kiss you senseless. 

I will take your breath away, the same way you did from me. 

I will never leave you again. 

Sam, love, this is all… terrifying. I keep wondering what pushes me forward, because the longer I stay here, the more violence and death I see. 

It’s almost like Yamatai, but worse. Much, much worse. And this time I don’t have you to keep me going, but at the same time… at the same time, I couldn’t be more thankful you’re not here with me. Maybe this… adventure would be more bearable with you by my side, but the risks, Sam, the risks. I should be dead twice over already. Mum and Dad must be watching over me, because… because I should be watching over you right now. Not writing you a letter, I’m going to give to you. 

Siberia is… well, cold. Horribly, heart-stopping cold. Never again, Sam, really. I prefer Egyptian days to Siberian nights. You have no idea how much I miss hot chocolate. Almost as much as I miss you. 

Everything here is trying to kill me. Wolves, bears, big cats that could be anything from tigers to panthers, because I’m too busy running away or shooting at them, to check what exactly wants me for dinner. There’s the… the organization. I’m not going to tell you more about them, Sammy, because I need you alive and well. The less you know about them – for now at least – the better I sleep at night. 

I miss you. I love you. 

When I get back – and God knows that it will be ‘when’, not ‘if’ – lets disappear in my house. Pretend that we don’t exist and just… explore. Plan, what we should do with the destroyed wings, my future Lady Croft.

I hope you’ll say yes. 

Say ‘yes’, Sam, because I cannot say it to the life without you. 

I love you. I love you. I love you. 

Wait for me, Sammy. I’m coming back. I promise. 

Love, Lara

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please review on your way out!
> 
> If I made a mistake you just _have_ to tell me about, pop in at [SharkTofu](https://sharktofu.tumblr.com).


	9. Butterfly 9: Butterfly Sending...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year! Something fluffy and sweet for the beginning of a new year.
> 
> Please enjoy, review and leave kudos for me to feed!

**To** : Lara <3

 **From** : nishimura_queen

 

Lara, darling,

You know this saying ‘to miss someone like a desert misses the rain”? Well, I'm no desert, but I'm dying without you. I miss you more than I could ever imagine. 

I just wish I knew if you’re safe. I know you and I know you will survive, but sweetheart, I’m going to be gray with worry before I hit 30. 

I love you, my dumb genius. Can’t imagine loving anyone else as much as I love you. 

I know you said after… after, that I might have some ‘damsel in distress’ complex after you rescued me, but Lara, honey, I love you. 

I love you, I love you, I love you, I love you. 

I will write it down, shout it from the rooftops, sing it and paint it down. 

I love you. You are my knight in a shining leather, but it doesn’t change a thing. I loved you before and I will love you long after. 

Marry me. Marry me please and make me the happiest woman on Earth. In the whole galaxy. Let me love you forever and one day longer. Let me wake up with you by my side and let me get old with you. I’m terrified of your journeys, but let me share them with you. Let me be your rock, your safe haven, your home. 

Be my home, Lara.

When you’re found, I’ll do this properly. With Sinatra in the background, red roses – because I know you’re a sucker for romantic clichés – and a simple gold ring. And will plan a spring wedding and won’t allow my mom to meddle in. 

I’ll do this properly, when you get back, but for now? This is me asking for your hand and hoping with all my heart that you will say yes. 

I love you, even though I wish I could kill you for making me worry like that. 

Marry me, Crazy Croft. 

I’m sending you all my love and wishes to get you home quickly. 

~ Sam


	10. Butterfly 10: Butterfly Saved

**To:** Lara  <3

 **From** : nishimura_queen

 

I slipped today, Lara.

Don’t panic, though! I know it’s a bad beginning, but I’m not going to start editing this email now. Or later. I don’t know. 

I slipped, though. Josh and Beth finally managed to drag me out of the house – be proud of me darling, I socialized with our college friends despite saying I’d never do this – and I hated it, but I know it was good for me. 

We were just talking, comparing our lives, avoiding the issues of… me _now_ and… I just slipped, you know? I reacted without a thought and called you ‘my wife’ in a room full of people, who once knew us both. 

(Beth wants me to thank you for winning her the dating bet they started in the 1st year. I hate our friends, kitten.)

I didn’t have the heart to tell her or anyone else that it was just me jumping the gun. That you didn’t say ‘yes’ yet. I don’t have the heart to remember this part myself – mostly because I’m your ‘hopeless case of persisting optimism’ ~~and because I’m terrified that you’re already gone.~~

I miss you so much, sweetheart. I want to hold you at night and kiss away all the nightmares we both have. I want to welcome you home and hide you from your family, the press, the world. 

I want to be yours, Lara. 

I cry every night, because I’m terrified that you can’t answer me, that you’re no longer ‘here’. 

~~Lara, don’t leave me, please don’t leave me.~~

I love you. 

I’m… sorry, kitten. I’m a ‘bit’ emotional right now, because calling you ‘my wife’ felt right. It felt like a piece of me just fallen in place and made me finally whole. I want to spend my entire life, and the next one, calling you my wife. 

My crazy wife. Perfect the way she is and I will never change her for anyone else. 

I love you. I hope you know how much I love you. 

Come back to me, my beautiful wife.

~~(And say ‘yes’.)~~

~ Love, Sam


End file.
